Well it has been a while since i have done anything on deviantart. In actuality i have not drawn anything significant in the last few months. Today i said to myself i should try again and what a mistake that was. now i am extremely depressed again and can't seem to get back to drawing anything. i would like to believe that i have grown in the past 6 months a lot actually. nothing really bothers me anymore. Except that i need relationships to keep me sane and willing. If i have no one i have no reason to do anything anymore. its bad i guess that i don't so anything for myself. I can't help it i was brought up that way. i care about others more that myself. In a way it keeps me happy. I already think i have wasted my youth and i know i am only 20 but i am extremely not outgoing person. I rather relax and talk about things rather than do them. So many flaws yet i still go on. i guess i am waiting for the right person to come along who will know what to do with if ever...I really hate that i still can't draw. again i guess its my fault for not practicing at all. This journal just made me more depressed...great.